Break Up Is Hearting; Effective Online Counseling May Be The Learning Opportunity

Question:
I dated my girlfriend for almost 6 months.
One day, she told me she wanted a break. I a waited a few days, and then called her. She replied by saying 'I don’t feel the same way about you that you do about me, and that’s not fair to you.' I waited about a month and asked if there was anything I could have done differently. She said 'no, there was nothing you could have done; I just didn’t feel the same way'.

This was a weird breakup for me. 2 weeks before it ended, she was telling me she had all these feelings for me. Why would she tell me that, and then end it 2 weeks later?

I tried so hard to talk to her after she ended it, but she refused. Is there a reason for that?

I’m not sure if these 2 things had an effect: first, I still hadn’t told her yet that I loved her, even though I did. Also, I still hadn’t invited her to meet my family yet (I met hers).

Maybe I wasn’t moving fast enough for her? I had asked her to move in with me, and she only said 'maybe'.
We are both 25.

Do you see anything here which tells you anything? I Assume I need some professional help; can your Online Counseling be effective in my situation?


My reply:
I’ll start with general remarks about dating and relationship building, and thereafter will give you some specific feedback impressions; and yes, Online Counseling can be very effective in your situation.

Generally speaking, the one sided love situation is indeed possible, due to many reasons; personality differences, lack of sexual harmony, different status and background are just a few. Therefore you should not take whatever happened to you as result of you being late (maybe I wasn’t moving fast enough for her?).

Also, just persuasion is not going to create love since this human phenomena is not a rational entity, so do not get discouraged due to your lack of success (I tried so hard to talk to her after she ended it, but she refused).

And the specific feedback:
1. be more emotionally open (I still hadn’t told her yet that I loved her),
2. be reciprocal (I still hadn’t invited her to meet my family yet),
3. learn how to ‘read’ social interactions and others’ feelings (this was a weird breakup for me).

The above three remarks take me to my recommendation: spend some time, emotional resources and even financial ones to get professional guidance in order to better prepare yourself for the coming relationship(s). Online Counseling can be very effective in your situation.