Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Marriage and Drinking: What Online Counseling Can Do?

The question:

My husband and I aren't getting along. I'm mad cause I think he drinks too much and is not prioritizing his responsibilities and leaves everything little thing for me to "worry" about and then when I mention it to him, I'm so frusterated by that time it comes out wrong and the whole thing blows up in to something it shouldn't have.

...He recently had to do treatment because of a dwi...

...He's not violent or a sloppy drunk or anything, but it's just that "addiction" and that he just drinks and drinks...

...I want to enjoy ONE in the evening. I have to hide my pain pills from him too or else he eats them like candy..

...We have not spoke in days cause I went off on him about drinking too much... Do I need Therapy? Do we both need it? Can your Online Counseling method work for us?

My reply:
Drinking is a problem that has many explanations, theories and treatment approaches.

Mine is that everything relates to relationship: either to yourself, or to your significant other(s). This is the underlying basic foundation that elicits the strong attachment to the substance material that becomes the substitute friend. And therefore you would not have too much of a success chance if you use anger to confront the drinker.
You both need a professional help here, since the 'relationship issues' are very complex and not too simple to solve. And 'Yes' - Online Counseling can be the process that you would and should use.

The secondary problem is the addiction. That is why your wish to enjoy (only) ONE in the evening is not realistic and probably counter productive.

Addictions, habits and behavioral patterns are also complex issues to deal with and therefore your chance to succeed without a professional help is not high. Needless to say - Online Counseling can be the process that you would and should use.

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